Storytime!

Just a little story about an evil Northern Empire and the vile socialism that was thrust upon its people...

Wild!

It's a dangerous and difficult thing to meddle in the world's childhood memories: only a precious few should ever be given that chance. Spike Jonze just may be one of them.

Fear and Glenn Beck's Eyeballs

Fame makes for strange heroes.

Two Great Things

Now you and I know the truth of the Flying Spaghetti Monster; but there is a sign that our wisdom is spreading to other fields:

On Tuesday night, March 24, the Wranglers will have their "Over 18" Night when they host the Alaska Aces. The face-off (9:05 p.m. locally) is 90 minutes later than usual, with an open bar for $20 starting at 7:30 p.m. and two-for-one drinks for fans 21-and-older throughout the game. San Francisco video artist Mike Relm, who recently toured with Blue Man Group and provided remixes for the Aqua Teen Hunger Force movie, will provide live music.

Oh yeah ... and the strippers. The V Theater inside The Miracle Mile Shops at Planet Hollywood (what, no "Powered by Reebok?") presents "Stripper-101," its demonstration series on exotic dancing.

And the description of Pastafarian Heaven:

The two things stressed most about heaven is that:
A) It has beer volcanoes as far as the eye can see, and
B) It has a stripper factory.

I think two-for-one beer is as close as we'll get to an actual beer volcano in this too-imperfect world, so this is clearly the Wrangler's efforts at paradise on Earth.

Ramen!

Fire Warning Exhaustion

This has been the setting for the local "Forest Fire Alert" sign leading into my home town for the past several months. The picture was taken on March 15th. Despite the warning, I just don't think there's a "moderate" chance of a napalm strike, which is about what it would take for a fire of any kind out here on the Wet Coast of Canada. I'd say this sign has zero credibility, wouldn't you?

Hey, by the way: anyone know when the last time the Terror Alert Level moved? Anyone? Anyone?

Here's a hint: the gubernatorial election was in October and November of 2007. But I'm sure that the alert level announced on September 10th of that year just a coincidence.

Not a Good Year

So, a year after Goodyear is named Science Minister, he's finally allowed to speak in public. It doesn't go so well...

Flashback

I know, I've done this one before. But with the upcoming Blogs Against Theology thingy, I thought it was appropriate...

Games People Play

We promise no pixels were harmed in the making (or playing) of Gears of War, Half-Life, Warcraft, DOOM, Fallout, Call of Duty, Civilization, or any other game. Okay? Really: killing game sprites is not the same as committing murder. Honest!

No, You're Not

You are not:

A) Ten feet tall;
B) Having a graduation party a short distance away from this sign; or
C) Graduating until you know how to use an apostrophe.

Just Along for the Ride

Welcome to Room 12A (an introduction)